Coward

Eight and a half weeks ago I got shin splints because I ran Chardonnay too hard on tired legs (or something like that).

Most every week since I have tested how the splints felt by running a mile — either round the Wilcox, or uphill on a trail. Running on dirt reduces the impact, and running uphill reduces it further, so these are kinder on the injury than running on a flat road.

Running uphill didn’t seem too bad. I could tell something was still wrong, but it didn’t really hurt, and it didn’t hurt the next day. Running around the flat Wilcox was another matter, after half a mile or so I would notice that I was limping and there was a sensation of weakness in the leg, as though it might buckle or something.

This Sunday I noticed that my leg didn’t seem to be hurting any more.

You’d think I’d go right out and do a short run to test it.

But I did not.

I was afraid.

Afraid that it would hurt after all. Afraid that I’d injure it again if it had started to heal.

I usually have been doing my mile runs on Tuesdays. But yesterday I did not run.

I decided I would run today (Wednesday) after yoga class. But I came home and actually cleaned up the apartment a bit (which shows what an odd state I was in, I’d do anything to avoid the discouragement of finding the injury still there).

Finally, at 6pm, I decided I could put it off no longer. I walked down the road, and then ran up to the Wilcox and around the loop.

It felt OK.

It really did.

Tomorrow I’ll run round it twice!

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One Response to “Coward”

  1. Adger Says:

    Know the feeling. (Am I just deluding myself or have I really gotten better? Why should it work this time anyway?) I was pretty discouraged this spring, before I realized that running was not the culprit for my knee problems (since much abated). I did a lot of putting off.

    But I was very stern about not overdoing once I finally got out there. Don’t be dumb.

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